I have PMS

I hate crowds.

And I especially hate crowds of mouth breathing assclowns who act like they've never seen a damned grocery store in they're lives (Overheard: "Oh look honey! ONIONS!")

So I guess I was asking for it when, in a temporary bout of insanity, I decided to go to the Grand Opening of a Whole Foods megastore. This store is over 50,000 square feet and I was curious what they had that the mini-Whole Foods by my work doesn't have.

Anyway, I said the serenity prayer (the one where you ask for the strength not to choke the shit out of stupid people) and got on with it.

Yeah it was crowded. They gave out free baguettes and if you spent $40 you got a free tote bag.

The moment the doors opened herd mentality kicked in. They had these platters of cheese samples and people rushed up to them and bypassed the tongs choosing instead to stuff cheese cubes in their mouths with their hands. At least they were right by the door which gave me a chance to beat the surge.

I like their meat and seafood departments a lot. They source all the meat and only carry sustainable seafood. The organic beef is all grass fed as well. I also like that they source their produce and tend to carry a lot of locally grown fruit and veggies. Their 365 brand of canned goods and condiments is good too. I can find any imported cheese I need too. I find that I don't spend any more than I would at the regular grocery store for those things.

They have a TON of prepared foods (and more free samples to deflect the hoardes away from me). I think the prepared foods is where they really earn their nickname of "Whole Paycheck". There's fresh cooked and refrigerated food from all around the world, Asian, Latin American, Indian, Italian, a bakery, a name it they make it. And the salad bar is enormous. I saw a bunch of old people rushing the seaweed bar. I have no idea why.

The prepared food is top quality. I'll have lunch there every now and then but if you're one of those non-cooks that get's take out most days of the week I think it can really add up.

There's a wine and tapas bar and even a little clothing section. I looked at some cute vegan shoes. The snarky side of me says, "sure they have no animal products but what kind of global foot print did that JEEP rubber sole leave? And they use child labor on some of those rubber farms don't they?"

This Whole Foods is fairly close to my house but I'll wait to go back when the crowds die down.


Heather said...

Hahahaha!! Attitude looks good on you, Kristi. :D

I saw the goings-on at Cooking Light (site meter ftw). Thanks for having my back. Sorry if my post seemed backlash-y, but tact has never been my strong suit. :P

Kitchen Queen Victoria said...

Kristi, the advantage of having these sorts of grocery stores on the other side of town is that I was able to pretty much ignore them for the first several months after they were opened. I think WF was opened for 8-9 months, and TJ's for over a year before I set foot in their doors.

I hate, absolutely hate crowds and those idiots who park their carts in mid-aisle while they ponder upon their choice between raspberry green tea and honey green tea just drives me batty...

That being said, Trader Joe's is a place where I think I could live. :)

Good luck in your subsequent (much later) visits!


KristiB said...

No problem Heather! I like Whole Foods. I just think grand openings bring out the worst in people. You should have seen the ravenous line for a 2"x 2" sample pieces of pizza. People even went to sit in the wine bar. At 9am.